I used to start at midnight, but thats gotten pushed up, so now its common for me to start at three in the morning. I just dont want anyone in the apartment, not for longer than a few hours. High Times: Tell me about your books before Metropolitan Life? One of my all-time favorite funny people was Jack Douglas. SHOP NOW. I just dont like domestic life. Full-time Im watching daytime TV., The following interview took place one afternoon in an apartment overlooking the East River. But a lot of people didnt like that piece and were angry at me. They had a very weird array of people who worked there. Fortunately they didnt, so its not around to haunt me. I hated the we. Thanks for offering this from your Archive. Why was your first apartment so horrible, apart from the roaches? I was very bitter about it because I had before me what seemed to be a successful future. And then all this junk in the theater, we would no longer need the kind of stuff that tourists like. I saw the only job that was worse than writing. But to this day I have never seen a worse movie. Their consciousness is so different from ours that they constitute a different species. On the way he started to drive into a tunnel, and I decided they might be going into a tunnel but I wasnt, so I tried to jump out of the car. Everybody else was. But I never liked pot much. Why dont you just put two of them in storage? High Times: What jobs have you had besides writing? Gauloises, English Ovals, any cigarette that looked like it would annoy people. At the age of. Like, in World War I, a whole generation of Englishmen died all at once. LEBOWITZ: Here are my qualifications: I am a New Yorker. In the past ten years, Lebowitz has been a regular guest on the television showLate Nightwith David Letterman. movie. Id call it Hello, This is Fran.. I was at that time living on the floor of a friends room at Boston University, and I knew that if I didnt smoke that ounce of marijuana, someone else would. Im sorry, were full up. Over some twenty years, Kincaid has made what my partner, the poet James Fenton, calls a plantsmans garden, full of rare species. I didnt have any adventures. Her hundreds of plants are layered into a composition of informal design, expressive of her refined aesthetic and untroubled eccentricity. So I would go to these AIP screenings. He had only the biggest movies, and he acted like I was affecting the box office. I remember she wore her hair in a French roll, and she wore what they called a hobble skirt. So they would talk to me. CLEMENTE: But dont you love being in someone elses apartment, possibly someone you dont know well or know at all? This is not a middle-aged curmudgeonly attitude; I didnt like people that age even when I was that age. We didnt live well. I Married Joan, I Love Lucy, I loved all those situation comedies. I was a big fan of Sky King. High Times: Were you a behavior problem in school? Meet Fran Lebowitz and join her on her rambles as she muses about deadly distractions, Times Square terror, subway stoppers and total building fails. Bankers. And soon she had a book offer from a fan in publishing. And even when America is not working that well, it still works better than other places. The dancers sit there waiting for him to come up with something. I got up every morning, brushed my teeth and went to the Village Vanguard and read poetry. I was not surprised to see this. High Times: If someone offered you an hour TV special that you could do anything with, what would you do? There was one 75-year-old woman who was a torch singer; she had varicose veins, and shed get up on this stool and sing Marlene Dietrich songs, also at ten in the morning. But I would always say, Well, its not that I dont want to write for these big magazines, but you cant edit it. And they would always say, What are you talking about? And then they would name thousands of geniuses who willingly submitted to being edited. "It would have been . I mean, New Yorks not exactly antiseptic. She never really wrote anything else and has since made her living on the social commentary speaking circuit. So I wrote The Secret Castle and was very disappointed to discover that no one published it. I have a great collection of A.I.P. Lebowitz: The Village Vanguard. They had a style sheet that was kind of the opposite of the New York Times. Lebowitz: I was 19 at the time, so I thought it was entertaining. Not just New York. My favorite thing to do is to call another writer who has a deadline, because they will stay on the phone with you. Id rather have people shooting up in my apartment; at least I dont have to smell it. I know this sounds insane, but I just hate it. I think there should be an oldies TV station like theres an oldies radio station, with Dobie Gillis and Life of Riley and all those great shows. I was more of a drinker. This is another thing most people don't know about Toni: though she was incredibly hardworking, she was physically incredibly lazy. Just one day the headmaster woke up and thought. "If you can eat it, it's not art. I didnt want to have my consciousness expanded, I wanted to have it restricted. I dont know howbecause when I was young, boys didnt type. It was 87. Frances Ann Lebowitz ( / libwts /; [1] born October 27, 1950) is an American author, [2] public speaker, [3] [4] and occasional actor. Fran is a renowned humorist and essayist. High Times Greats: Fran Lebowitz, Americas Funniest Femme Fatale. It was like the myth where if a girl gets pregnant and takes the boy to court, if three other boys come into court and say that they had slept with her, they would all get off scot-free. The terrace that starts at the back door ends in a border of stones; the lawn, planted with thousands of daffodils, slopes down to a thickly shaded creek. Lebowitz: Not Samuel Z. Arkoff or anyone, but the press agent there loved me. Things that people will say to me, mostly, is that you shouldnt have all these books. By Susan Devaney. I think Brigid Polk did that once. No matter how dull they are, they still have to figure things out for themselves. No, no, no. FRANCESCO CLEMENTE: After a certain age, in the early hours of the morning, the pressure drops, which is the reason why. I like that Oscar Wilde. Capitalism, pretty old-fashioned, too. General in Boston. And just think how fantastic New York would be. I didnt know that there was anything about me that had a name, that could be diagnosed. Why dont you just put some of your books in storage? And I always say the same thing: What if I told you I had four children? CLEMENTE: There was a brilliant article by Rgis Debrayhe was a guerrilla guy with Che Guevarasaying that, since the election of the American president has an effect on the life of every citizen of the planet, all citizens of the planet should vote. CLEMENTE: [laughs] Lets talk about your twenty thousand books. Lebowitz: I like Marshall Brickman. And its not just the Bush family, all families designate each child as having some particular trait. I reviewed lots of movies that never opened in New York, only in drive-ins. I had been spending all of my time with drug-addict college students. You can see in it the sentimentality of Jane Eyre. Not at all, because I was going as a servant. And then, that machine is waiting for you, just humming uh-huh, yes?. I have to move the lamp to the desk. During the time that I read poetry, because I was such a wonderful reader of it, people who actually had a legitimate interest in poetry would hear me and ask me to send it to them because they thought it was good. CLEMENTE: Have you been following the presidential campaign? He was the only person who took me seriously enough to ban me. And it allowed people who would be fifth-rate artists to come to the front of the line. Why did your family send you to America? Because I was stupid. I thought theyd probably just give me another joint. I would wake up and be so excited because I could smoke. My parents did. I never write anyone letters. LEBOWITZ: Thats kind of backwards. I would stand at the border and say, Youre coming here to live, really? The Fran Lebowitz Reader. Theres no reason why it has to be the way it is. Her big, broad-frame glasses evoke the Italian movie stars of the sixties. "That is ridiculous as an amount of money. Instead of representing oil as self-evident, Sinclair imbues it with a kaleidoscopic range of associations that reimagine it on visionary new terms.. I remember one of the best days of my life was an all-day A.I.P. Fran Lebowitz slams NYC mayor Eric Adams. Im only afraid when I write. LEBOWITZ: That was later, for my next column, I Cover the Waterfront. That was after I met Marc. She takes one. When I was younger, I might have said six months, although I think the longest relationship I was ever in was three years. Fran Lebowitz Toni Morrison was one of her best friends for almost 40 years, up to Morrison's death in 2019. Im sorry, were full up. Lucy stops sending her salary home, and I did stop sending mine. America is a great idea, so thats why its a great country. And the truth is that most families have no smart ones and no pretty ones. Fran Lebowitz: I Cover the Waterfront. We were all really jealous of him. Without these tourists, New York would be fantastic. Photograph: Ali Smith/The Observer. I cant remember the last funny thing I ever said. In an essay specially commissioned for the podcast, Aisha Sabatini Sloan describes rambling around Paris with her father, Lester Sloan, a longtime staff photographer for Newsweek, and a glamorous woman who befriends them. Comedian and podcast host Bill Maher pushed back against author Fran Lebowitz in his upcoming "Club Random" podcast when she suggested that schools have gone off the deep-end because of Republicans. when asked about his sexuality replied "I cover the waterfront." Andy said it went over like a lead balloon. For instance, I, unfortunately, take the subway a lot. Especially really horrible ones. You sit or stand in the subway, and you look aroundI do, because I dont have a phone so Im not playing a gameand you see people. And then I would go out, get Marc coffee and a Danish, bring it to his apartment, and he would type it for me, because I never had a typewriter. While working in the local Carvel ice-cream store, she attended an Episcopalian day school until she was thrown out for non-specific surliness. Certain that she would starve to death following this banishment, Lebowitz skipped college and moved to Manhattan, where she pursued such jobs as taxi driving, belt peddling, apartment cleaning (with a small specialty in Venetian blinds), and selling advertising space forChangesmagazine. If you were going to have dinner with some of those older people you mentioned, say writers, which ones would you pick? I would say maybe 74, 75. A decade seems like a good enough time for filmmaker Martin Scorsese and cultural critic-writer Fran Lebowitz to return to the screen. High Times: Did A.I.P. There could be butchers and bookstores. Like a city. I write so slowly that I could write in my own blood without hurting myself. General with two other people who were also smashed out of their minds. CLEMENTE: I think in your life youve said no more than yes. I know who I like. There were times when my mother and I would go swimming and she would disappear for a second, and I would imagine the depths just rolling over her, that shed go deeper and deeper and Id never see her again . Copyright 2023 Interview Magazine. I get tired, but fear keeps me awake. And people sent in money. Lebowitz: Because I was 19 years old. I have to take all the junk off the desk and wash the desk. I always liked people who are older. Fran began her pro writing career at 20. It was the most money Id ever made. My first action on coming to New York was walking into Grove Press, plunking down the manuscript and demanding they publish it. Lebowitz: No. There were maybe 40 poems, the only poems I ever wrote. I also went through a period of watching Name That Tune. Then 50 questions, then 20 questions, then, finally, you said, Can you see Im trying to read?. Then I moved here. It was written in the nineteenth century by, I think, a seven- or eight-year-old child who was the daughter of someone very rich who had this book printed. The Great Gildersleeve. Lebowitz: Ill never make it as a typist. Interview, at the time, six people read it, believe me. But now, as Ive grown up, all my friends have developed much more mature writing habits. It was charity really. Im such a slow writer I have no need for anything as fast as a word processor. To me, dictating a book seems impossible. The psychiatrist also had shoulder-length hair and Levis under his white coat, and I spent ten minutes arguing with him over whether Id taken acid or smoked pot. The other day I read that last year 58 million tourists came to New York where a puny eight million people are trying to live. Then I went to a prep school that had a paper called the Wilson Wyndowe. Thats not writing. There is only nervousness or death. But he was very nice, and in the letter that banned me he told me how much he liked me. Would you say, You just cant afford to house four children. I would rather have a typist. They made me wait three hours to see the psychiatrist, and by that time I was starting to come down. Its very disconcerting to be in the basement of a night club at ten oclock in the morning reading poetry on a stage with a spotlight on you and no one there. These were oral book reports. LEBOWITZ: I used to. press handouts. But I moved into that apartment in 1970 or 69; there was no ceiling in the bathroom. And Orson Welles agrees Behind him comes Fran Lebowitz, flustered from whatever is going on in the street. High Times: Did you watch television as a child? Lebowitz: To be glamorous. And people are constantly telling me, whether they are friends who feel sorry for me, because I cant find a place to live, or real estate agents, You cant afford an apartment the size you need with this many books. Twenty-five people sitting in the room staring at you while you are thinking. Children played marbles on it. It became the major thing I was punished for. Or I would call people on the telephone and have their responses broadcast. Getty Images. was he fascinating? I just knew an eight-year-old wrote it and it was published. I dressed in old clothes, thrift-shop clothes. I always was.FRAN LEBOWITZ. Another time I saw a real pretty girl standing in front of the mirror with a little tiny cigarette butt hanging out of her mouth, teasing her hair. Oh, now I remember my favorite TV show from my childhood. No, youre not. Alison Roman Dishes on Resy, Air Fryers, and Erewhon, The Gatekeepers of New Yorks Most Coveted Tables Tell All, Kathryn Newton and Paul Rudd on the Joys of Being Extra, Alex Cooper Calls Her Daddy Mel Ottenberg at the Prada Show in Milan. Lebowitz: My writing habits are basically nonwriting habits. I wrote for the school newspaper. President Biden repeatedly framed his campaign and his administration as defending "the rule of law" after what he and others portrayed as the lawless reign of President Trump . These four guys figured out how to lift New York out of this dire financial condition with the campaign I Love NY. I hated this thing. Im a horrible girlfriend. This must be about 15 years ago. Once a girl was sitting on the window ledge smoking a cigarette and the matron walked in and the girl jumped out the window. Her early fiction, much of which also appeared in that magazine, was collected in At the Bottom of the River (1983), a book that, like her Talk stories, announced her themes, her style, the uncanny purity of her prose. Initially, she covered "Best of the Worst Movies," but later changed the name of her column to "I Cover the . And I feel this way more and more about the Republican candidates, certainly. A sense of, Im all alone in the world, and I have integrity. Lebowitz will appear on stage for four performances only . Fran Lebowitz has tough love for tough COVID-19 times. China is not a great idea: capitalism and a dictator. Lebowitz: No. I think I first came across it in one of the Bronts. I went to bed earlier than anyone in the world. He was the one that was supposed to be president. Its like the two worst possible things you could imagine together. I believe that at birth everyone gets the capacity for a certain amount of drugs and alcohol, everyone the same, you can do it all between 15 and 19 like I did, or you can stretch it out over 70 years. Monday June 7 2021. I was mesmerized by The Modern Farmer. "It's a thousand billion," she continues, audibly indignant. Then I start thinking that maybe somewhere in the house is a column that I never turned in. I was caught smoking, and I didnt have the cigarette in my hand or smoke coming out of my mouth, and they suspended me anyway, so it turned out not to be true, just suspicion was enough. And as Fran took on polyester, landlords, press agents and pop psychology, her reputation grew. FRAN LEBOWITZ: The blood pressure or the air pressure? I said, "Toni, the restaurant's five blocks away.". Until then homesickness was something I only knew from books. They had one guy who was like an Elvis imitator, only he imitated Oscar Wilde. And I read them. Donald Trump is not my fault. Bloomberg was always bragging how many hotels were being builtI remember seeing him on the news, saying, And this is the nine millionth hotel in Queens. Queens! There was nothing televisiony or psychological about it. Shes really not our type. I was home sick when I was expelled. Like, this is the smart one, this is the pretty one. Now, even if you have money, you can have a horrible apartment. I started being a poet when I lived in Poughkeepsie, and I wrote a book of poetry called Poughkeepsie Blood. But I know a lot about them because its impossible not to. I wrote a musical comedy for my grandparents 35th wedding anniversary. I think if there were no such thing as men, there would be no word processors. In the early 1970s, Andy Warhol hired Lebowitz as a columnist for his magazine Interview, where she wrote a column, I Cover The Waterfront. And the matron walked in, and the girl actually swallowed it. Volume 1: Best of First Decade 1969-1979. Frans column was called The Best of the Worst; her job was reviewing the best of the current bad films, and she worked as hard as a Variety critic, taking in two or three screenings a day. Then I started getting suspended from school for smoking. But after a while Fran outgrew the bad-flick format. CLEMENTE: You didnt have a kitchen, but I doubt that you cook. But all the rest of them were, including Jeb Bush. I don't care how she makes her money but she helps make the world a better place in to live in. Lebowitz: I guess after about six months I started getting caught constantly. That was actually a job. No one has ever said it that way. He wasnt a comedian, but he was the funniest talk-show guest. Because you could always get shifts in a restaurant. People ask me, Arent you interested in what theyre thinking? That was on the second floor. We Pick Up With Our Adventurers As The Party Begins. She is alive to the advantage in the irony that her literary heritage had not predicted her, exalted, brave, free. And thats why Frans first book, Metropolitan Life, has become a smash hit. Lebowitz: I have to say I have only written back to important people, people in the publishing business. I could have written a trilogy in 11 hours. Your email address will not be published. I Cover The Waterfront. It was terribly disconcerting because I knew that they werent going to cure me. I dont know why it played in Morristown, New Jersey. Did you write it at the last minute? Thats good for at least an hour of not writing. She was an outsider in Antigua, and she looked different. A pen. LEBOWITZ: I dont cook. CLEMENTE: You failed to describe your qualifications to be mayor of the city. LEBOWITZ: Well, you know, so few Americans vote that we may not even notice it. Everyone was paid in cash. Because if people dont hold grudges, it means they just dont care what people do. The other is that horses are hands. More information They dont know what anything is, so they have to make it up. Dutton, is a collection of Frans columns. In an excerpt from The Art of Fiction no. Don Rickles. The person who checks you in and takes your name and insurance came over to me and actually said, to me, Why did you choose Mass. I often think of the time before my brothers were bornand this might sound very childish, but I dont careas this paradise of my mother and me always being together. Lebowitz: Yes, but not with much zeal. Now she is winning new . Thats the problem. I had always heard that Jeb Bush was the smart one. She said, You know what its like being with you? High Times: What was it like being a cab driver? I remember what year that was. Or acceptance or understanding. At one point, I dont know why I had this idea, but it was probably after Andy did those big MaosI had this idea to do this wallpaper of Mao, and we made this fake wallpaper. I read How to Be a Naked Bus Driver and My Brother Was an Only Child. Did you find subject matter in your taxi rides? More at IMDbPro Contact info Agent info Resume Born October 27, 1950 Add to list Nominated for 1 Primetime Emmy 1 win & 3 nominations total Then, in 1972, she began writing for Andy Warhols Interview. LEBOWITZ: No. Then she published two books of essays Metropolitan Life and Social Studies - both wonderful. It was The Modern Farmer. Ill also invent things, like I have to clean the entire apartment before I write. If I lived in another country, like a country that was, say, an enemy of the United States, I would be more amused than I am. They all say, Oh I did it this afternoon, or, Oh, Im finished. CLEMENTE: Do you think youre the manifestation of integrity? What are they going to possibly say thats of interest? Just because its February doesnt mean were talking Roses! Not only dont they not understand people different from them, they hardly understand themselves. CLEMENTE: So everything that you write is written by hand? Holding a grudge is the modern equivalent of having standards. High Times: What was the style? It was incredibly boring writing that stuff. Florinda Donner and Carlos Castenada were both accused of fabricating their encounters with Indigenous healers. In clips of them talking on stage, Lebowitz looks uncharacteristically awestruck. 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